Messed Up...
Life's feeling so messed up now.
MSN messenger not working. No communication today. So boring...
Feeling so sick. Went to see doctor. Perhaps God is trying to console me... the doctor is a Christian that helps in mission work frequently. So we chatted about stuff. That really brightened up my life. Anyway, not going school tmr. Note to shiyong: I'm not going for cross country so change the person i/c of checkpoint 1.
Spiritual life... some days feel the fire of God burning in me... some days don't even feel like praying or worshipping God. i jus force myself to pray and don't feel his presence on those days. what's the point of doing so then?
Can't go Emerge Preaching... i forgoed my chance because i'm sick and i am feeling weak. like wad sis meiyan say, i should take a good rest at home cos there's no point travelling so long to YMCA for that 3 minutes when i'm sick. Feel I let the cell group down. I let God down. I let myself down. I spent 3 weeks preparing the sermon outline but yet I cannot go... Hard work gone down the drain. But like what pastor preached, just thank God that He is still with me through all these.
Exam results... passed 2 only and failed the rest... am i really that bad? i dun wanna hv meet the parents session... i'll get killed for sure... not literally but physically... my mom's depression attack will work up again and i don't think u all noe wad will happen when ur mom takes a knife and tries to stab u... God help me... It may seem to my friends as if I don't care at all when I saw the results slip, but I'm freaking worried now... Anyway thanks to some pple esp victor for trying to console me... just dun wanna get my results... dun wanna get my report book... i noe its just the mid-point, but my parents wont understand... they'll think its the end of the line... haiz...
Wonder what's happening to me now?
Is God testing me?
MSN messenger not working. No communication today. So boring...
Feeling so sick. Went to see doctor. Perhaps God is trying to console me... the doctor is a Christian that helps in mission work frequently. So we chatted about stuff. That really brightened up my life. Anyway, not going school tmr. Note to shiyong: I'm not going for cross country so change the person i/c of checkpoint 1.
Spiritual life... some days feel the fire of God burning in me... some days don't even feel like praying or worshipping God. i jus force myself to pray and don't feel his presence on those days. what's the point of doing so then?
Can't go Emerge Preaching... i forgoed my chance because i'm sick and i am feeling weak. like wad sis meiyan say, i should take a good rest at home cos there's no point travelling so long to YMCA for that 3 minutes when i'm sick. Feel I let the cell group down. I let God down. I let myself down. I spent 3 weeks preparing the sermon outline but yet I cannot go... Hard work gone down the drain. But like what pastor preached, just thank God that He is still with me through all these.
Exam results... passed 2 only and failed the rest... am i really that bad? i dun wanna hv meet the parents session... i'll get killed for sure... not literally but physically... my mom's depression attack will work up again and i don't think u all noe wad will happen when ur mom takes a knife and tries to stab u... God help me... It may seem to my friends as if I don't care at all when I saw the results slip, but I'm freaking worried now... Anyway thanks to some pple esp victor for trying to console me... just dun wanna get my results... dun wanna get my report book... i noe its just the mid-point, but my parents wont understand... they'll think its the end of the line... haiz...
Wonder what's happening to me now?
Is God testing me?
posted by aCKj at
1:08 AM
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